Last night I met the coolest, nicest guy I've met in a very long time. We met on one of the "casual" meetup sites and were looking forward to meeting. It was agreed that if any connection was made that it would remain a casual thing.
Wouldn't you know, I'm totally falling for him! Thankfully he's kind of digging me too, but we're both unsure of whether/how to proceed. This wasn't supposed to happen. We weren't supposed to click in a way that we start making other plans and talking about relationships and how we handle conflict.
It's still very early and I barely know him, but in a way, I feel I know what I need to. He's laid it all out there and I want to try this and see what happens. He told me that the only way it would end is if I screw it up! No pressure there, huh? I laughed and thanked him for already jinxing things. But, really, that's my biggest fear- that I'll screw up, that I already have.
He jokingly told me that I was no longer allowed to see other people. I'm just confused by the mixed signals. This was supposed to be simple and easy and even though I feel like I've known him forever, I'm hating how the feelings have suddenly complicated things.
A good guy friend once told me "it will happen when you least expect it." I get that now. I really didn't see this coming. It's good but it's not. I'm just scared. I've been wrong so many times before that it's hard to not doubt my own judgement.
Why???
No comments:
Post a Comment